Taking Chances
by Miharu Endou
Summary: Sometimes, love gets buried by pain and anger. It's as if it never existed. You would just have to get it before it's too late. NxM.
1. Chapter One: I'm back

Taking Chances

_I just wanna start again._

_Maybe you could show me how to try._

_Maybe you could take me in somewhere underneath your skin._

* * *

_**Chapter One: I'm Back**_

"Mikan, honey," Mom said. "Are you sure you want to come with me to Tokyo? You could stay here with grandpa if you want to. He'd be willing to stay here, as well."

I smiled at my mom reassuringly, and said, "Don't worry about me, mom. I'm _twenty-two, _remember? I want to come with you to Tokyo. I'd love to help you expand our business. Ever since we opened the pastry shop, I grew fond of seeing people's satisfied faces when they eat your food. And, it would be fun since I'm with you and grandpa."

I'm currently living in the countryside with mom and jii-chan. It's been twelve years since Ruka-pyon helped me escape the academy. To say that I don't miss them is a complete lie. I miss them. So much. The most painful memory I had was parting with them, especially with _him. _Just when I finally realized that I loved him, too, so damn much, things got complicated.

That time, I wanted to go back to the academy badly. I missed the classrooms, the campus filled with alices using their alices casually. I missed Central Town and the Howalons. I missed Hotaru, Ruka, Anna, Nonoko, Koko, Kitsunume, Yuu, even Sumire! I missed Jin-jin's rough glares, Serena-sensei's predictions and Narumi-sensei's father-like treatment. My heart aches every time I remember the things that made me feel complete.

_Natsume. _God knows what I felt when I looked at him as I fled with his best friend. He looked as if the world was ending. _His world. _He loved me. I knew that. I may look naïve, but I wasn't utterly stupid and insensitive. .ME.

Like what I've said before, it's been twelve years since I last heard from them, well except for Hotaru. After their graduation, she somehow found a way to track me down and gave me a surprise visit. Surprise was an understatement. I almost died when I saw her right in front of me. I think I nearly killed her in the process. I hugged her so much that she started to look pale and she started coughing. Nevertheless, she hugged me back.

We talked about how life had been in the academy after I left. Ruka asked her out, and she said yes. Sumire almost got kicked out when she tried to send a letter to me. Yuu was valedictorian (as expected). Anna and Nonoko were invited by world-renowned chefs to go with them in a quest to find the perfect recipe. Koko forced Sumire to date her. Tsubasa got Misaki pregnant after leaving the academy. That was all. The only thing she said about Natsume was that he's just a jerk. Ouch. That kinda made my heart itch…in pain?

Anyways, back to the present. We're going to Tokyo in a while because apparently, we have a business to spread out. My mom opened this small bakery when I was thirteen. It, then, turned into a known pastry shop-slash-resto cafe. I'm proud to say that a lot of tourists go to our suburbs just to taste my mom's scrumptious delicacies and meals.

She wrinkled her nose, and then shook her head. She said, "Oh Mikan! You never spoil the fun! You're the only source of fun grandpa and I have. We only want what's best for you. So, are you really sure? 100% sure? You don't want to stay and manage our branch here?"

Sometimes, mom's such a paranoid. I sighed and said with mock hurt, "I'm hurt, mom. It's like you don't want me to come with you. I'm sure about this. Besides, you promised Shichi (my cousin) that you'd make him take care of this branch while in Tokyo. We've been in the countryside far too long, anyways. I miss the city aura, AND, this way, Hotaru and I won't have a hard time seeing each other anymore."

"Of course I want you to come with us, Mikan," she said, almost like a squeal. "I just don't want you to be stressed. I mean, the last time you've been in the city, some deranged elementary principal tried to ambush you and turn you into one of his minions. The bastard."

Gee. Thanks a lot for reminding me, mom. I guess grandpa felt the tension between us, so he started to laugh, and said, his voice rough and mature, yet playful at the same time, "Yuka, Mikan wants to come. We kind of get it now. You should stop interrogating her before she changes her mind. You would love to come with us, right, Mikan?"

I nodded my head, a grin etched in my face. Grandpa makes me feel all happy when he talks. He understands every move I make. I guess it's because I've been with him longer than I've been with my mom. He's old, I mean reaaaaally old, but he's still so bubbly. I don't seem to have an idea where he gets that energy of his. He amazes me every time.

We started packing our clothes and the things we would be bringing to Shibuya. The equipment for the resto café was brought there a few days ago. Some of the furniture were brought to our place there. We'll be living a few blocks away from the place. My mom managed to buy a pad in one of the priciest Suites in Shibuya. She told us she bought the pad because it was near the pastry. Grandpa and I know that she bought it because it was comfortable and big. I guess my mom just wants what's best for me.

Finally, I'm going back to Tokyo. It makes me feel all giddy and nervous just thinking about it. I took out my phone and dialed Hotaru's number. I hope I'm not disturbing her, it's still quite early. She answered it and said, quite annoyed; "_What do you want? This better be important."_

I gulped nervously and laughed forcefully. I said, "Well, I'll be going to Tokyo in a while, and I was hoping I'd meet you. It's been months since we last saw each other!"

"_Idiot,"_ she said. "_It's 6 o'clock in the morning. You wake me up just to tell me you're coming here and you want to meet? You could've just texted me or called later at hmmm, I dunno, maybe when you're here already?"_

I laughed at my friend quietly and apologized. She grunts and hangs up. At least she didn't scream at me or something, right? I'm so excited. I'm gonna see Hotaru again! And, maybe she'll bring Ruka-pyon with her. And, maybe he'll bring Natsume with him. Just maybe.

* * *

"Hey, Hotaru," Ruka asked. "Who called at such an early hour?"

Hotaru shrugged and stood up from the bed. She said, "Mikan. She's moving to Tokyo today. She wants to see me."

Did he just hear what she said? Mikan's coming back? He stared at her like she's a madwoman, and got a glare from her as a response. She said, "Don't look at me like that."

He muttered a 'sorry' and stood up from the bed, as well. They've been living together ever since Ruka proposed. Hotaru wasn't really against the whole living together thing, because she didn't believe that she has to be married just to live with her slave-slash-fiancé. Ruka must've had it hard on him, huh?

Ruka smiled at her fiancé, who was pacing left and right in front of him. He chuckled and said, "I missed her, too."

She stared at him and stopped pacing. She gave him an almost smile and said, "It's been months since I saw the idiot. I can't help it."

"At least you saw her a couple of times already," He started. "I mean, c'mon! It's been _twelve _years since we saw Mikan. We should give her a welcome party. Let's invite the gang. I'm sure they'd be delighted to see Mikan. What do you think?"

She stared at him as if he did something brilliant, and nodded her head. She nodded more and said, "She does love celebrating. But, I won't spend my money on it. Since you're the one who had the idea, why don't we use your credit card for the party?"

Money has never left her mind. Hotaru was still the Hotaru before. Ruka just chuckled lightly and said, "I can't do anything about it, do I?" and got a nod from her fiancé.

"Okay, then," He said. "Let's start calling our friends."

* * *

After four long hours of travelling, we finally arrived at our pad. My mom hurriedly went inside even before grandpa and I got off the car. While running, she said, "Mikan, don't forget, fifth floor, room two. Okay?"

"Got it!" I screamed, helping grandpa with our stuff. The staff helped us take most of our stuff, so we had to carry only about 3 bags. When we entered the pad, I was surprised to see a room only for one person.

My mom was grinning while leaning on the front door. She hugged me tightly, and said, "Surprise! From now on, this is gonna be _your _pad. Your grandpa and I have our own room downstairs."

The room was nothing from what I've imagined. The walls were a tint of purple and pink. A new cream sofa was placed almost in the middle of the living room. In front of it was a flat screen TV and a stereo. The kitchen was amazing. The refrigerator, coffee maker, oven, microwave, and all the utensils were brand new. When we entered my bedroom, I felt like a kid again. All my stuffed toys were placed neatly in a corner. My closet was light orange, and it had a lot of small flower design. And my bed was so fluffy and comfy. It felt great. The dresser was cream and there was a mirror above it.

The bathroom was still a bathroom. It had a bath tub, a toilet, a medicine cabinet and a mirror. It wasn't big, nor was it small. It was just right.

I stared at my mom, half teary-eyed. I said, "You didn't have to do this, mom. I was fine with living in a same pad as you and grandpa."

She shook her head and said, "You deserve this. You're twenty two already. It's time you pursue your dream. I knew how much you wanted to be a volunteer in an orphanage. So, guess what? There's an orphanage two blocks away. You can go there during your day-offs."

Granpda smiled at me and said, "There's an animal shelter beside it, too. You're going to have fun here, grandchild."

I hugged the both of them and the tears freely flowed. We all cried and laughed at each other. Mom wiped her tears, then mine. She patted my shoulder and said, "Feel at home. Our room's in the sixth floor, room four. Grandpa and I would go to our pad now to unpack. You should do so, too."

They left, so I took my bags and went straight to my room. When I unpacked my first bag, the first thing I saw was a framed picture of me and my past classmates in the academy. I took it and stared at all of the people in the picture. Hotaru was on my right, her face still emotionless. Anna and Nonoko were above me, hugging each other tightly. Koko and Kitsunume were beside them, acting goofy as usual. Yuu was beside them, who looked like he was trying to stop the two from goofing around. On the left of Koko was Sumire, looking pissed as hell. Beside her was Wakako, laughing at Sumire. Mochiage was floating on top of us while Yura Otonashi was staring at him with her glassy eyes. Ruka was beside Natsume, and he was smiling brightly, his usagi sitting on his lap. And, Natsume was sitting right beside me, and it was as if his lips were oh so slightly twitched upward. He was smiling.

I smiled to myself and placed the picture frame in the dresser, somewhere I could see it all the time. After unpacking most of my stuff, I decided to call Hotaru again. Her phone rang for a while before she answered it; "_You're in Shibuya now, at the Shibuya Imperial Suites, fifth floor, room two. Wow,Mikan, nice place."_

"How'd you-" she cut me off an said, "_I told you a while ago, didn't I? Don't forget what my alice is."_

Oh yeah. She must've invented something to track me down. I was about to say something, when she said, "_Ruka and I will be coming there in a while, in about twenty minutes. Prepare some food. We still didn't eat our lunch."_

Before I could even say anything, she hang up. I laughed at myself and went straight to the kitchen. I wasn't surprised to see the fridge packed with food. Once my mom prepares something for me, she makes sure that everything has to be flawless.

I started taking some fish and shrimp, rice, and nori. I'm gonna make some sushi. Before starting, I called mom. I said, "Mom, do you have some pastries with you? Hotaru and RUka are coming in twenty minutes. Hotaru wants food."

Mom giggled and said, "_Hotaru didn't change at all, ne? Well, yeah, I have some cupcakes here and a blueberry cheesecake. I'll bring it there in a while."_

"Thanks mom!" then, I hang up. I started cooking and remembered the time when I thought Permy how to cook. It was devastating. She was so bad. But, I'm glad I helped her.

Remembering I was an alice, I used some of the alice stones to help me cook. In fifteen minutes flat, I finished the sushi. I even made a crab roe just for Hotaru. Mom entered in a while and brought the pastries with her. We placed it on the dining table.

Mom kissed my cheek and said, "Have fun with Hotaru and Ruka. Grandpa and I are still unpacking our stuff. Tell Hotaru I said hi."

I nodded my head and led her to the door. She smiled at me more before leaving. My mom was still beautiful. I always admired her beauty. She didn't look her age. She's forty, but she still looks and act like she's in her late twenties.

After a while, while I was watching TV, someone barged in. It was Hotaru, and behind her was Ruka. Ruka smiled at me apologetically while Hotaru stared casually at my room. She nodded her head while looking at the walls and furniture, and said, "Pretty impressive, Mikan. How'd you afford this? When you were in the academy, you spend most of your time in the attic."

I pouted at her comment and said, "Mom gave it to me as a growing up gift. It's too much for me. I would've been okay with living with them in the same pad, but she insisted. I couldn't say no since it's been payed for already. Hey! You didn't hug me yet!"

I ran to her and gave her the tightest hug. She started to cough and said, "Stop killing me."

Ruka and I laughed, and I apologized. I, then, hugged Ruka. He smiled at me and said, "Wow, Mikan. You still haven't changed. You're still beautiful. We missed you so much. Things haven't been the same without you there. It felt empty."

I giggled at what he said, and said, "Thanks,Ruka. I missed you guys, too. I missed the academy a lot. I've always wanted to come back, but it was too dangerous for me to stay there."

Hotaru's eyes glistened when she saw the dining table. She mumbled to herself, "Mmm, Crab roe." and started eating, not even bothering to invite us to eat with her.

We just laughed at her and went to the dining table, as well, then munched on the sushi. She took a slice of blueberry cheesecake. She nodded her head and said, "I'm guessing, your mom made this."

I nodded my head, still eating my sushi. Ruka took a slice and almost jumped in delight. With wide eyes, he looked at me and said, "Wow, you're mom's great! This tastes awesome. I'm sure the people would love you family's cafe."

"Resto cafe," I corrected.

We ate quietly until Hotaru broke the silence. She said, not looking me in the eye, "Ruka and I prepared a welcome party for you. The gang's coming."

Ruka smiled at me and said, "Yeah. We'll be having it at our house. This friday. Don't worry, it's just a simple reunion and welcome for you."

I'll see my old friends again? That's great! I grinned at Ruka and said, "Thank you so much! I'll finally see the rest of them."

"You're lucky your friends are nice," Hotaru said. "You do know some of them will come back to Japan just to see you? If I were them, I wouldn't bother. You're still the same idiot from before."

Hotaru's never really good in expressing herself. She just uses insults to say what she means. Ruka seemed to understand that. I focused at my food when I aught Ruka caressing his fiance's hand. The way he looked at her like she's the only woman in the world. I'm really happy that he finally found the one, and what makes me happier is that the one he found was none other than my best friend.

It was quite obvious that Hotaru loves him back. She may act cold, but a small blush is very evident in her face when he held her hand. While we were eating a while ago, she glances at him every once in a while, her lips formed a small smile. I envy them.

"Should we invite Natsume?" Ruka asked Hotaru.

I stared at the both of them and looked away. I pretended not to listen.

Hotaru just shrugged and said, "Why bother. The bastard's just gonna ruin the fun."

That was when I looked at Hotaru again. Her voice was full of loathe, maybe even disgust. I, then looked Ruka in the eye, hoping to find an answer.

When he caught my gaze, he looked away awkwardly and said to Hotaru, "But, Hotaru, he's still part of the gang. And, if you've forgotten, he's my best friend. He's pretty close with Mikan, too. Wasn't he, Mikan?"

I nodded my head slowly and looked at Hotaru curiously. She was clenching and unclunching her fist. What made her so angry? She sounded like she growled before she said, "Fine, invite him. It's not as if he's gonna come anyways."

Finally having the courage to talk, I asked, "What exactly happened to... Natsume when I left the academy?"

"Mood swings," Ruka said quietly. "Nothing more."

The both of them acted weirdly after our conversation. After a few minutes, Hotaru stood up from her seat and said to Ruka, "We should go now. I still have work to do. And, you should go to the clinic now. You have an appointment for today, don't you?"

"Oh shit," He muttered. "I totally forgot!"

Ruka smiled at me apologetically for the language, and said, "We better go now, Mikan. We're going to our work. I'm sure you're quiet from the journey here. We'll see you on Friday. Thanks a lot for the food! It was nice seeing you again."

I smiled at him and waited for Hotaru to look at me. She didn't. Before leaving, she just said, "We're expecting to see you on Friday. I'll pick you up at around 6pm. Bye."

Nothing more. Before closing the door, I also caught her glaring at Ruka after leaving my pad. What happened to them? I'll be expecting a straight. answer this Friday.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Gakuen Alice will never be owned by me. Tachibana-sama does. :DD

**Author's note: **It's been a while since I last typed a story. I guess I've just been too preoccupied with what's happening and all that. But, right now, my head's pretty clear. This story just entered my head, and I don't want to miss this wonderful opportunity. It's been a long time since my brain created a new story. I'm quite proud that this is longer than what I usually write. Haha.

BUT, don't worry, I have no plans of deleting _Meet Mr. Perfect. _As soon as I find the perfect idea for the next chapter, I'd update. I promise. Just please be patient with me. :D

AAAAAAAAND, if you have suggestions or you want to clarify some things, , feel free to go to my formspring account. I'd be getting FAQs there. :D

here's my formspring account:** www,formspring,me/nissadevora **(just change the comma to a period)

no need to register to ask. :D

Miharu Endou would totally appreciate it if you rate and review. :D


	2. Chapter Two: Indifferent

**A/N: **Wow. I've been updating once a week. o.o I wish I could maintain this speed. Well, thank you for the reviews and for reading this story!

I hope you support this story the way you supported _Meet Mr. Perfect _and my one-shots. :D

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gakuen Alice. :D

* * *

_**Taking Chances**_

_I just wanna start again._

_Maybe you could show me how to try._

_Maybe you could take me in somewhere underneath your skin._

* * *

**Chapter Two: Indifferent**

indifferent [in díffrənt] _adj_

**-without care or interest:**

showing no care or concern for or interest in somebody or something

* * *

The days passed by idly. I didn't notice it was Friday until I received a text from Hotaru.

_Hey idiot,_

_In case you forgot, today's Friday._

_You're coming over this evening._

_I'll pick you up at about 5pm._

_DON'T make me wait._

_I'll wait for you outside._

_-Hotaru_

_P.S. Wear something nice. A cocktail dress will do._

I groaned. The only cocktail dress I brought was the one my mom gave me for the opening of resto café's branch in Tokyo. It was a short, midnight blue georgette strapless drape dress. My mom bought if for me, telling me that it suites me.

Yeah right. She just wants me to look seductive and find a hot guy to snog.

She said something like, "_Well, sweetie, to be honest, my colleagues are asking me if you're lesbian or if you're celibate. Since I know you're not, you should find yourself a boyfriend, maybe even just a boytoy. You're a pretty girl. Don't waste it and snog a guy. You shouldn't grow old bitter and lonely."_

Uh huh. That whole 'boyfriend' thing isn't my priority right now. Back in Osaka, a couple of guys tried to ask me out, but I never really bothered to try it out. I'm still waiting for the right one... _to come back? _I dunno; is he even waiting for me, too? With his looks, I doubt it. He could've gotten himself a bunch of _sluts. _

I slumped in my bed and sighed loudly, covering my eyes with my arms. Maybe mom's right. I'll grow old bitter and lonely. Imagining Natsume with another girl disheartens me. But, he's not the type of person to treat girls like trash, right? And, he's not an easy man. Right?

Right?

Right?

_RIGHT?_

Oh who am I kidding.

I rolled on the bed until I fell flat on my face. "Ouch," I grumbled.

Swiftly, I stood up from the carpeted floor and dusted my shirt and shorts. I looked at the clock, and noticed that I still haven't eaten my lunch. It's past two already. Just in time, my stomach rumbled and I squirmed. _God. _I never knew I was so hungry.

I hurried to the fridge, hoping to find some left-over food to heat. _Yes._ There was chicken. I placed it in the microwave oven and punched in the time, then went to the living room to watch TV. Back when I was in Osaka, mom never bothered to buy a TV nor a radio. She said that knowing the news wasn't really helpful since most of the happenings usually occur in the city.

I, uninterested, pressed the remote swiftly, watching as the TV blinked from channel to channel. My fingers unconsciously stopped when a blurred picture of a man came to view.

The reporter in the TV said, "Rumors have spread that this fine man with jet black dishevelled hair is BACK in Japan. The young, successful, and good looking business man was said to be leaving the Narita International Airport at about 8 am. If you still don't know who this man is, well, he's-"

I changed the channel and rolled my eyes. I never did like businessmen. Based on my experience, most of them were snobby, degrading rats. They only use people. They think that money can buy everything. I'm sure that some of them are alices, members of the AAO even. It makes me despise them more.

I lay down on the couch and stared at the plain white ceiling, ignoring Spongebob's loud voice coming from the TV. I focused my eyes on the ceiling. It was dull, just like what my life had turned into. Leaving the academy made me feel as if a _big _part of my life has been taken away from me. I only stayed there for two years, but those two _long _years were the best.

Unconsciously, I lit a small fire in my hand. When I noticed, I immediately stopped, and stood up from my couch, my back cracking in the process. I slouched and massaged my back slowly, trying to ease the ache. When the pain subsided, I heard the microware do a _'ting', _so I went to the kitchen and took out the now warm chicken. I took some rice in the rice cooker and ate silently in the dining room.

After washing the dishes (well, dish), I showered, and started preparing for the welcome party Hotaru and Ruka-pyon prepared for me. I applied just the basic make up; powder, some light eye shadow, and lip-gloss. My mom told me not to put cheek tint since my cheeks were already pink. I decided to put some mascara to make my eyelashes look a bit longer.

"I'll only put this on once," I said to myself.

Though I'm a girl, I never really knew why women should wear makeup. Why paint on your face?

I was about to tie my hair up when Natsume's voice suddenly popped out from my head, '_You should leave your hair down. It looks better on you.'_

I let go of my hair and let it be. I just brushed it to make it look neat. God, was I such a pushover. I still let him boss me around even when he's not around.

A few minutes later, Hotaru sent me a mail;

"_I'll be there in a few minutes._

_Wait outside the lobby._

_-Hotaru"_

I went down and waited right outside the lobby. Right on time, I saw Hotaru's car approaching. She stopped right in front of me. I opened the passenger seat and went inside quietly. Why was I feeling nervous?

Hotaru seemed to notice my tense state, she smiled at my swiftly, and said, "You don't have to worry. They're still the same people you knew. It's just that they're more mature now. They missed you a lot."

Finally having the courage, I said, "Is Natsume coming?"

"I'm not sure. Well, I doubt it," Hotaru said.

I decided not to ask, and decided to stay quiet again. The air was awkward. Hotaru coughed a bit and said, "You do know that you look different in your outfit, right? I thought you were a conservative, country girl? What made you wear that, Mikan?"

I laughed at her and said, "More like _who _made me wear this. Mom bought me the outfit so that I can find myself a proper boyfriend. She doesn't want me to end up bitter and lonely."

Hotaru shrugged and said, "Well, she's right. You're in your twenties now. You should find yourself a boyfriend. An idiot like you would've found someone by now already. I can help you, but only if you give me a reasonable payment."

She didn't change at all. Money was still her priority. I laughed at her comment and said, "Nah. I'd have to pass on that. Boys aren't really my priority today. I just want to focus on our business."

"Yeah right," she mumbled to herself. After a while, we started slowing down. We entered the gate of a modern-looking manor. I gaped and said, "This is your-"

She nodded her even before I finished my sentence. She was _that _rich already? Wow. I continued gawking at her house. She's reach a lot at such a young age. Suddenly, a huge wave of inferiority came to me. Most of my old classmates must be like her, too.

The thought made me feel smaller. Hotaru patted my shoulder lightly and gave me one of her rare smiles. She must've noticed my uneasiness. I went out of the car and smiled back at her when she went out as well. I should've brought my jacket. It was cold.

I followed Hotaru's lead as we went inside her house. While going to the living room, she pointed some of the paintings made by Yuu Tobita. Most of the paintings were of the academy. They were made perfectly. It was an exact replica of what the school looked like.

We entered the living room, only to be welcomed by some familiar faces. They all stared at me like I was a ghost. It kinda made me feel awkward. I coughed and said, "Uh, Hi?"

"Mikan!"

They all approached me and hugged me tightly. They were all laughing heartily and the sight just brought me to tears. It's been more than a decade since I last saw them all.

Anna and Nonoko still look alike. Their hair was still long and its color remained the same. Koko and Sumire were beside each other, looking more mature. Sumire's hair was still curly, but it was shorter than before. Koko still had that wide grin on his face. Yuu now had longer hair, and he stopped wearing glasses. Mochu was still half-bald, but he looked so professional while wearing a long-sleeved polo and slacks. And oh! Tsubasa and Misaki were also here! Misaki looked chubbier; must be because of giving birth. Tsubasa still had that star tattoo below his left eye.

They stopped hugging me and stared at me. They were all smiling. I wiped my unshed tears and laughed. I said, "Minna, I missed you so much!"

"We missed you, too, Mikan-chan," Koko said gleefully. Everyone nodded in response.

Sumire approached me and whispered, "Natsume's here, too. You looked distracted when we welcomed you. He's sitting in the corner."

And there he was, sitting calmly in the couch, looking bored as a log. His hair was as messy as before, and his eyes were as red. Something bothered me though. Though he looked calm, something was obviously troubling him. His jaw was tightened and he narrowed his eyes slightly, as if glaring at the floor.

I stared blankly at him. He didn't even acknowledge my presence. He must've noticed my long gaze at him. He stared at me blankly, looking uninterested. I felt a pang in my chest when he stared at me indifferently.

Everyone stared at us, so I forced a smile. Natsume stood up from his seat and said, not even looking at me, "Oh, you're here. Well, welcome back, Sakura."

_Sakura. _He didn't call me polka-dots, or strawberry, or idiot, or… Mikan. What was wrong with him? I laughed nervously and said, "Thanks for coming, Natsume-kun. I appreciate it."

He shrugged and said, "Don't thank me. Ruka forced me to come. I was supposed to be in a meeting in Germany right now, but thanks to this affair, I lost a client."

"Oh."

What a smart answer, Mikan! So, he was only forced to come. Hotaru glared at him and said, "No one wants you here, Hyuuga. If you hated to go here so much, why'd you bother?"

"Ask your fiancé, Imai," was all he said.

This needed to stop. I forced a laugh and said, "We shouldn't be fighting right now, you guys. We should just have fun."

The both of them groaned, and Hotaru went to the garden. All of us followed her. I was amazed at the landscape of the garden. It felt like I was still in the countryside again; a high-class countryside though. There were marble tables and chairs, and there was a long, white table full of food.

Sumire sat beside me when I sat alone in one of the marble tables. She stared at me, her chin resting on her hands. I spotted a diamond ring on her finger. She said, "How've you been, Mikan? Hotaru told us that you and your mom are opening a resto-café in Shibuya."

I grinned at her and said, "Well, I've been good. We just lived a simple life. How about you? Uh, yeah. It's opening soon."

She smiled at me and played with her hair. She whistled casually and said, "Well, Koko and I are getting stronger."

"Oh! Is that why you have a ring on your finger?" I asked, eyeing the ring.

Out of impulse, she immediately covered her ring and said, "No! We're not engaged nor married. We're doing things slowly, to get ready for marriage or something like that. Like, come on, Mikan. We're only 22, for crying out loud! It's too early!"

Just in time, Anna and Nonoko sat on our table and smiled at me. Anna said, "What's wrong with getting married early, Sumire? Hotaru and Ruka are engaged already, and they're as old as us."

Nonoko nodded her head in agreement and said, "Uh-huh. And look at me and Kitsu. We got married a few months ago in Paris, and we're as happy as ever. Too bad he can't come here today to see you, Mikan."

Wow. Nonoko's married. Before I was able to say anything, the three of them neared their face to mine, and Anna said suspiciously, "How about you, Mikan-chan? Did you find someone special?"

Special my butt. I shook my head and said, "Nah, I never had the time to do so. We were quite busy with the business. Besides, most of the people who showed interest in me were guys who were shallow."

"Shallow in what way," Nonoko asked.

I sat comfortably in my seat and said, "Well, they only liked me because they said I was beautiful and I would be great as their trophy girlfriend. I'm no trophy. I'm just Mikan."

Anna stared at me incredulously and said, "Are you blind, or do have reaaaally low self-esteem? Mikan, you're beautiful! You look hot in your dress, too. I never expected you to wear anything like that."

Sumire stared at my appearance and nodded her head slowly. She said, "Wow, Anna's right. That's kinda too revealing for you. If I haven't forgotten your taste in outfits, you prefer dress with more cloth. But, nice choice."

They stopped complimenting me, and Sumire said seriously, "Okay, let's cut with the small talk. Since you're bothered with Natsume, I'll be frank with you. He changed. He's an ass. You must still be in love with him, right? Well, forget it."

How could Sumire say such a thing? Wasn't she his fans club president? Nonoko looked at Natsume cautiously and said, "Sumire's right, Mikan-chan. It's best if you give up on him, because it looks like he gave up on you a long time ago."

_Ouch_. 'He gave up on you a long time ago…' just kept ringing on my head.

Anna nodded her head slowly and said, "We don't mean to break your heart, Mikan, but it's better if you find out before he himself would break your heart. He changed a lot. He turned to a cold-hearted man. He's just like Persona."

"What do you mean by 'just like Persona'," I asked.

Sumire stared at Natsume and said, "He went berserk when Ruka went back to the academy alone. I dunno. I understand that he was hurt because you left, but he changed. He started cutting classes again and did more missions than required. He started acting emo and everything, and then suddenly, he was like a rock, emotionless and cold. He burned most of the fan girls. When the girls were still persistent, he dated them. After taking their virginity, he dumps them."

The three of them stared at me when I started to shake my head. I can't believe that Natsume would be like that. I said, "Natsume would never do that. He… He has a sister, remember? He wouldn't want to see girls crying because his sister might be through the same thing, too."

"His sister died not long after you left," Nonoko said. "She died because the AAO attacked the Hyuugas' house. His father survived, but his sister didn't."

Just when Natsume will need me the most, I disappeared. I felt bad. I stood up from my seat and excused myself from the three. I've heard enough. I needed water. Badly.

I was going to the water fountain when Koko bumped into me. He was carrying a plate full of food. He smiled at me sheepishly and said, "How's it going, Mikan? You look pale. Is something wrong?"

"I just need water," I said swiftly, rushing to the water fountain. He didn't follow me, and went to his table.

I took a glass and filled it with water, then drank it immediately. What was happening to me? I was about to go back to my table when I bumped into Natsume. Oh great. Just great.

He stared at me and said, "You're pale."

Thanks for pointing out the obvious, Natsume. I laughed it off and said, "Uh, yeah. It's just that Sumire's stories have been too much for me to handle. So, how've you been?"

He shrugged and said, "As usual, hell. You?"

I gulped and said, "Uh, I've been okay? It's been twelve years, ne?"

He dragged me into a corner and glared at me. He sighed and looked away.

"What?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes and said, "Look, I know that you're trying hard to start a conversation, but really, Sakura, don't bother."

"Natsume," I said. "What happened to you?"

He stared at me with those cold, crimson eyes, and said, "I changed. That's what's happened."

I rolled my eyes and said, "Uh huh. So, what? You decided to take the virginity of every girl who's in love with you?"

I was angry. I couldn't control what I was saying. Natsume glared at me and said, "Yes, Sakura. It was my choice to do so."

"Then, tell me something, Natsume. Why are you acting like you don't like me anymore?" I asked.

He said, "Things changed. I was young. Back then, I never thought I would ever be in love with a girl as I was with you. You left; I grew up. Like what I've said, things changed. I stopped loving you; as simple as that."

My heart was slowly shattering into pieces, but I fought the urge to cry. I said, "Natsume, I thought I was special for you? Didn't you tell almost everyone when we were in the academy? Why would that have to change?"

"It's because when you grow up, your heart dies."

He looked at me one last time before he walked away, leaving me alone. My eyes finally betrayed me, and the tears I tried to prevent finally fell. I felt miserable. This was supposed to be the best night where Natsume and I would reunite and fall in love all over again.

But, why did this have to happen?

* * *

**END OF CHAPTER**

Tell me what you think about the story. :D  
RATE & REVIEW please~~~ :D

Please and thank you!


	3. Chapter 3: Agony

**A/N: **Hey you! It's been a long time since I last updated this fic, so sorry about that. Don't worry; I have a steady plot idea for this story now. It just makes me all excited to write this.

As for MMP, I want to finish it when the manga ends, so I'll be updating every time a new chapter in the last arc comes out, I think. But, I'll make sure I'll end this on the date of the last chapter of the manga. :(

Have fun reading! And no, **I don't own Gakuen Alice**. ;)

* * *

_**Taking Chances**_

_I just wanna start again._

_Maybe you could show me how to try._

_Maybe you could take me in somewhere underneath your skin.

* * *

_

**Chapter Three: Agony**

agony[ággəni] _n  
_**-** **great pain or anguish:**_  
_intensephysical pain or mental anguish

I couldn't control my tears. Why does my heart hurt so much? I didn't know rejection would hurt this much. What did I do wrong for you to be this way, Natsume? I wanted to ask you that question, but I felt too crushed to still say anything. Watching you walk away from me, not even getting an expound explanation of what exactly happened to_ us, _and me so helpless about it made me feel more miserable than I already do.

I can't breathe. It's as if someone's trying to strangle me. I started coughing badly, scaring away the crowd circling me. I stared at them while coughing. They all looked at me with such pitiful eyes. I felt worse.

Hotaru didn't back away and instead, she approached me. She wiped the tears on my face and said, "What did he tell you?"

"He said… doesn't lo… me any….more," was what came out of my mouth no matter how much I tried to say something decent. I guess I just couldn't yet.

My best friend just stared at me, her eyes showing comfort and love. She pulled me to her and said, "Cry. Cry your heart out until you can't anymore. Just cry."

And I did. I cried in her arms until I felt numb. I cried until I couldn't see the people around me anymore. I cried until I couldn't anymore.

I wanted to cry until I forgot, but I can't. I wanted to forget the past so much, but I was too scared to lose the memory that made me most happy. I was most happy when I was with him, bickering, insulting each other, laughing, falling in love, and being there for each other.

I don't want to lose that.

After that, everything else went black.

* * *

"What should… do?"

"I'm not… Myself. What…. Think?"

"You're… friend. You should… plan."

"Poor… She must…sad."

"I can't… just too much… kouhai."

"…never expected…do that… I… him."

"I'm his friend and all, but Natsume's such a bastard."

The last thing I understood was what the last person said, and with that, I stood up from where I was lying in. Hotaru, Ruka, Sumire, Yuu, Tsubasa-senpai, Misaki-senpai and Koko were in my living room, conversing with each other. The last one who spoke was Koko.

The first one who went to my side was Hotaru. She shoved a glass of water to me and said gently, "You should drink. I'm sure your throat is dry with all the crying." I followed her and drank it.

Ruka looked at me apologetically and said, "Mikan, I'm so sorry. I didn't know things would turn out this way. I didn't really think that Natsume would still act that way once he sees you. I guess I was wrong. I'm really sorry. I do hope you'd forgive me."

It wasn't his fault. It was mine. It was my fault I didn't listen to Sumire and the girls. It was my fault I wanted to see him badly. Now Ruka's feeling guilty because of what happened. I shook my head and said slowly, "its okay, Ruka-pyon. You didn't mean to do it. It was my fault. You don't have to worry."

He was still about to say something, but Hotaru blocked him off. She said, "Both of you are not at fault. It's that Hyuuga. Ruka and I were thinking the same thing that Hyuuga might go back to his usual cocky but approachable self once he sees you again, that's why we pushed through to have this reunion. But, I guess no one could turn that stone of a heart he has back to normal. He's that much of a hopeless guy."

I stared at the former fan girl's face, hoping to hear her say something to defend Natsume, but she didn't say anything. She only looked at the floor, looking as dejected as everyone in the room was. Koko stood up from his seat, with him clenching his knuckles. He said, "Let's kick his arse now. I want to fist his face 'til it's unrecognizable."

Sumire pulled him back to his seat and said, "Don't do anything rash, Yome. You might end up in the slammer."

"Curly here's right," Tsubasa-senpai said. "We should calm ourselves first before we do something. As much as I want to break his face, I won't. Hotaru, do you have a plan?"

Violence shouldn't be the answer. Hotaru shook her head at him and said, "I don't think we have to do anything to Hyuuga. He-"

"What do you _mean _we shouldn't do anything to him? He's a _freak!" _Koko exclaimed.

Hotaru glared at him and coughed, getting our attention once more. She said, "_He _is a hurt man, Yome. And, truth be told, I don't see anything wrong with what he did. He told Mikan he didn't love her anymore, nothing more, nothing less. That's all he did. Was it wrong for him to clarify what he felt for her? He's actually doing Mikan a favor."

She was right. Natsume only told me that he doesn't feel the same anymore. Koko stood up from his seat again and said, "Weren't you supposed to be Mikan's friend? You shouldn't side with him!"

"It's true," Hotaru said. "Mikan's my friend. But, we have to be rational. It's unfair for us to judge him that way because of his actions. I'm sure Mikan would be thinking the same thing if she were in my shoes. Ruka, what can you say?"

They all stared at him, waiting for his answer. He said, "Hotaru's right. Natsume was just being honest, or he might have been trying to be cautious once again. He doesn't do things without thinking of the consequences that the people around him might face because of it. All of you in this room can testify to that, right?"

No one said anything for a while, contemplating what Ruka had just said. I shuffled in my seat and said, "We don't need to do anything to him, you guys. I'll be okay. You don't have to worry."

I just hope I could do what I said. _Be okay. _The others just shrugged, but Koko stared at me intently, as if hoping to find a contradiction. I looked away.

Before they all left, Koko approached me and said, "Give me your number, Mikan."

"Okay." I decided not to argue anymore. I was too tired to do so.

He stared at me and said, "I'll give you a call once in a while just to see how you're coping. You okay with that?"

I nodded my head and gave him a weak smile before closing the door. I just need to shut off the outer world for a while now.

* * *

…_I said I love you, but I lied… it's more than love…_

Who could call at such an early time? I groaned, took the phone and stared at the caller ID. _Koko._ "Hello," I said.

"How are you doing now," He asked, also sounding like he just woke up.

It was sweet of him to care like this. I smiled to myself and answered, "I'm okay, Koko, really. You don't have to worry about me because of what happened. I really appreciate it though. Thank you so much for caring."

No response. "Hello?" I asked.

I heard him sigh for a while, and then he said, "Okay, then. Good morning, Mikan. Take care of yourself, okay?"

Before I was able to respond, he hang up. I placed the phone back in the table and threw myself back to bed. My eyes still a little sore, and I don't like the feeling of it.

I tried my best to fall asleep again, but it seems like I can't anymore. I stared at the clock. 8:30 am. Mom and grandpa must be worrying about me now. I never told them about what happened last night.

After leaving the bed, I brushed my teeth and tied my hair in a ponytail, too lazy to comb it. Just when I was about to take some food in the fridge, I heard someone enter the room.

When I came to the living room to see who it was, I was shocked to see my mom together with the least person I wanted to see, _Natsume. _

My mom was grinning at me like some lovesick kid and teased, "Look who we have here, Mikan. It's Natsume-kun! It's been a while since you last saw each other, right?"

I avoided their gazes and gave a soft "Yeah" to them. Mom tapped Natsume in the shoulders and said to me, "He came almost an hour ago, actually. But, I presumed you were still asleep because he was just standing in front of the door. It was a good thing I came to check up on you. I brought him to our suite first to entertain him, so we had a little chat. Didn't you know, he's now a well-known businessman? I never expected Hyuuga-kun here to choose the path of becoming a businessman. He's even interested in franchising our resto-café once it flourishes! Isn't that great?"

"Mom," I cautioned. "I don't think… _Natsume, _would have the time to do that. We're not even famous yet, remember?"

She shook her head and said, "Like what I've said, Mikan, _once it flourishes. _I'm not saying he's going to franchise it immediately. But, he's willing to help in advertising our resto-café."

Beside mom, Natsume awkwardly coughed and said in the most professional way, "My Company has been helping up and new small businesses like yours for a while now, so it would be nice to help promote your resto-café, but once it has gained popularity, we would like to franchise it."

Once again, mom tapped him in the shoulder, but this time a little harder, making Natsume move slightly. Mom smiled at him and said, "No need to be so formal, Natsume dear! You're like family to us now! Feel free to talk casually, or is it because I'm here? Wait. Of course it is! Well, I don't want to bother the two of you, so you guys can talk privately now while I go back to my suite! Have fun!"

"Mom-" I tried stopping her, but she was running out the door as fast as she could.

***Bang* **Silence. I stared at him awkwardly, waiting for him to say something. He didn't. I, then, sighed and decided to ask, "Why are you here?"

I tried my best not to make it sound not too cold, but it ended up sounding icy, even for me. He smirked at me and said, "I just came here for business, Sakura."

"You could've called instead," I said. "Or, maybe even mail me or something. How did you even know that I live here?"

He went to the couch and sat casually, placing his feet on the table like he owned the place. He took some glass stones in the center piece to play with it and said, "I own Shibuya Imperial Suites, so I know everyone who lives here."

Why didn't I ever suspect that he owns this place? I just knew he would be _this_ successful! I'm still not ready for this. I don't want to argue with him anymore. I faced him and pleaded, "If you're still going to rub it in my face that you moved on, and then I'm begging you, not now please. I can only take this much."

This time, he sat properly, looking all professional and everything. He placed the glass stones back in the table and said, "I'm not here to do that, Sakura. Don't feel so enlightened that I'm here right now, because I do this all the time."

"You… do?"

He smirked at my obvious confusion and said, "Yes. As the owner of the Shibuya Imperial Suites, I believe that it is my duty to keep my clients happy. And, I happen to stumble upon some pretty good looking ladies, so it's a win-win situation. My clients are happy, and so is mini-Natsume."

There he is with his innuendos again. Just when I was going to escort him out (well, more like shove), he stood up from the couch and stared at the room one last time before giving his attention to me. He nodded his head and said, "Well, since my job is done, I'll just leave now. You better be happy in the suites now."

Somebody please stop me from tearing this guy's smirk off his face! Did he _not _remember what just happened the night before? I scowled at him and said, "You don't have to visit every day, Mr. Tenant, because I'll be happier if you won't."

He shook his head in amusement but went to the door to leave anyway. But before he closed the door, he stared at me with the same smug look he had and said, "Will you truly be happy if you push me away from you because of rejection?"

Then he left, leaving me with one question stuck in my head.

_Will I really be happy if I push him away?

* * *

_

**End of Chapter**

To all the readers who have always been there for me, thank you! I sound all cheesy and everything, but I really appreciate your reviews and pm's and wall posts. Y'all inspire me so much. And to all the MMP readers who kept on giving reviews despite not updating it yet, I'll try my best to make the last chapters worth it. :D

Rate and review pleaaaaaaaaaaase~ ^_^


End file.
